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Category: Fitness
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How To Be Stronger Than Your Critics
There are many things I wish were different about America, but one thing I’m very grateful for, is not being treated like an unwanted pariah for not being under 130 lbs.
Growing up in Asia, the beauty standard of a young adult woman was to be thin, preferably to the point of having a teenager’s body. You want to be frail so that everyone around you felt sorry for your weak ass, and some knight in shining armor would inadvertently come to your rescue if you in as far as slip from not having enough energy to stand firmly on the ground.
You want to avoid all fat, all carbs, and live on fiber and vegetables. You want to not eat, and if you do, dig your throat and remove all traces of sustenance that could be the reason your thighs are rubbing. You want to not drink so much liquids, not even water, because that could make you swole. You want to do it to the point of having a very long and lean silhouette, and sit with an arched back so that the hollows of your stomach can be concaved to show how thin your waist is from your side profile.
Being beautiful in Asia means you need to be a few things. You should appear more stupid than guys, show no expression (it’s all about the shy girl, unsure girl stealing looks), and you want to speak sweetly and softly. That is key. You want to be a damsel in distress, but make damn sure you are skinny enough. If you’re born thick, don’t bother with the theatrics because it won’t work unless you do it to a guy with questionable standards.
It’s easy enough to speak like you’re half-dead when you don’t eat, because you won’t have energy to speak when you’re starving. If you develop dark eye circles from malnutrition, don’t worry. You only need to slab on copious amounts of lightening loose powder to mask your lack of health, and use pink blush to give the illusion of great blood circulation. That is the Asian girl way.
Whatever you do, DO NOT GET ABOVE 130 lbs. If you do, be prepared for a lifetime of concerned and often times, hurtful remarks from guys, other women, your parents, relatives, non-relatives, EVERYBODY who knows your immediate family. Be prepared to never date a typical Chinese, Japanese, or Korean guy. Or face the abuse like a champ. You’re going to need a strong mind to weather the onslaught of unsolicited advice and random attacks. Some guys are not going to be nice to you.
Needless to say, as my weight has never been lower than 150 lbs since I was 13 years old, I didn’t have a great experience dealing with body issues growing up in the far east. Most people were decent and unassuming, but once a week, your shape, size, and weight will come up in conversation when you meet any of those people listed above.
NOT YOUR REAL FRIENDS THOUGH.
Your BFFs have your back, and they love you just the way you are.
I have spent half a lifetime of HELL listening to Asians tell me I need to lose weight like a broken record. My mother, a former beauty queen was in existential crisis for birthing a meatball. The Asian guys I dated liked my personality enough to want to date me, but ultimately couldn’t take the unbearable thickness of my being.
I’ve been told by a famous producer, that if only I would lose a bit of weight, my career in media would skyrocket. My thick girl stories of heartache are many, and as I don’t care to live in the past, I’ll spare you the gory details of how I got my battle scars.
Fast forward to present day. I am doing Crossfit. I have stopped starving myself, because I can’t flip tires without nutrients.
New International Version
But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”2 Chronicles 15:7
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Start with why you want to be fit and healthy
On an every day basis, we are often bombarded with images of perfectly shaped women, selling promises of a beautiful body in exchange for buying their product. I know, it’s what sells, and everybody loves buying, but for a regular food-loving woman with a metabolic disadvantage like me, seeing bodies of women who were already born with figure cards stacked in their favor can be downright depressing.
I know no matter how hard I try, I can never be as young, flexible, and as strong as the demi-goddesses of fitness. I say this with a serving of reality, because youth and time are commodities that cannot be replenished. I can’t turn the clock two decades back, and suddenly become the fittest woman on earth. I can’t push as hard, nor recover as fast as my 18 year old self. Even if Jesus powered my cells, I wouldn’t be allowed to compete with women half my age.
Moreover, genetics is a real thing. If I was designed to be a pro-athlete, it would have happened a long time ago. I would have somersaulted and done back flips as a kid. I would have been able to touch my toes. I would have won sport events that I tried very hard at doing. I never did. I was a sick, plump child with lots of respiratory ailments. I could never do splits like my classmate Alice, nor run as fast as friend Mona. I was always plump, even when I didn’t eat.
All my life I’ve struggled with my weight. My tiny Asian girlfriends delighted in striving for under 100 lbs, while I’ve never weighed lighter than 150 lbs from the time I was 14 years old. It didn’t matter if I had chicken pox, measles, or follicular tonsilitis. It didn’t matter if I went vegan, did keto, or ran 10k every day for two years. It didn’t matter that I did detoxes, or cut calories.
I would screw my body up, drive my white blood cells up, iron levels down, and pass out on floors from undereating, but I could never go lighter than 150 lbs. Never.
I eventually found out why in 2010. Three diagnoses later, I learned that I have a hormonal disorder that makes it near impossible for me to lose weight. Is is the reason why I couldn’t do anything to shed the weight since I was a child, and wait for it, there’s no cure. I have lived with it since childhood, and will live with it for the rest of my life. So they say.
So why would someone with a broken body sign up to do the hardest and most challenging workout program in the world, at my age?
I’ll tell you WHY.
Because I AM STILL ALIVE!
I am not so sick or so old that my body cannot be trained to move in ways that expand my life. Even if I can never be a Size 4, I don’t care. I’m done with making the excuse that nothing ever works. I may never be a viking warrior woman, but I can be the best version of me.
There’s still so much I can do to serve God, and if I can improve my physical fitness to serve Him better, that’s all that matters.
The LORD is my strength and my song; he has given me victory. This is my God, and I will praise him–my father’s God, and I will exalt him!
I am not trying to be the next Katrin Davidsdottir, I don’t have Viking genes. Nor am I trying to engineer a body that people will salivate just by looking at it… well… one can still dream!
I am working out to be the best me. I’m training my mind and body to be strong, so that I can be strong for others. I am doing this so that I can manage my condition, and overcome what might happen if I were to do nothing at all. I am doing this to thrive in my own capacity. I’m doing this for God, for me, my family, and my community.
Slowtard is better than nevertard. N’est-ce pas?
I can always be healthier and fitter than yesterday. That’s all I aim for.
So the question is, why do you want to be fit and healthy?
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Slowtard Ahead
Save the AMRAPs, I’m one of the last people to finish workouts for time at my box. I’m okay with that. I’m okay with it because, I’m also one of the newest people. I’m okay with it, because 2 months ago, I would never have imagined being able to throw wall balls, wall walks, deadlifts, and snatches.
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Why You Do What You Do
The words that are spoken in this video, cannot be topped by my futile attempt to match it’s awesomeness. I can’t.
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The Biggest Advantage of Losing Weight…
I just thought I’d share this with you.
I was a big girl a year ago, but I was also content with my life. I’m not the type to sob about how fat I am, and let that get in the way of what my soul was put on earth to do.
I traveled, learned new things, ran 2 charity campaigns successfully, and had a lot of love from friends and family.
The weight didn’t really affect who I was as a core person, and it didn’t snub my light.
But I was heavy.
Now let me tell you what being heavy means. It means that when I went to Bali to learn how to surf, they had to replace my 9ft board with a 12ft board that was 3-inches thick, because my weight sank the board whenever I tried to push up to stand on the water.
It was incredibly hard to spring up because I had to carry my own weight to do the things that other girls didn’t have to.
For surf instructors to tell me my weight was the reason I couldn’t get up and ride the waves like my lighter counterparts was frankly, depressing. Because I’ve always wanted to be a surfer girl.
I didn’t get to stand up that day, and the brochure said they guarantee you’ll stand up or you get to come back until you stand up. I eventually went back another day for the free session (alone) and was able to stand, but that day with my friends, I felt like such a failure because I was the only one who didn’t stand up.
Heavy also meant I was slower, because I had to push 85kgs of weight forward when other little ladies only pushed 55. It was a lot harder to do all the active stuff that I loved, and I love the outdoors and being active.
And I found out a few more stuff about what heavy meant in Bali.
One day, a bunch of my friends and I decided to go to the Waterbom. Sliding down the slides was so scary!!!As the law of gravity states, the heavier something is, the faster it drops!
Imagine the kind of speeds I was reaching coming down what were supposed to be fun waterslides. Easily I would have gone at least 30% faster than everyone else, since I was 30% heavier. It was PETRIFYING!!!
So while other chicks were screaming like cute girls getting a cheap thrill, I thought I was going to die from a heart attack from being airborne for a few seconds, and being expected to land back in the slide. What if my ass was so big I missed the landing, injuring and paralyzing myself in the process?
Being heavy also meant that doing wall climbing made my fingers feel like they were going to dislocate, and when I ran it was really hard on my heart, and my knees hurt.
So the biggest advantage to losing weight for me hasn’t really been about the way I look, but that I could do the things I love with a higher rate of success and be a lot healthier.
It’s just so much easier to do things and get around when you’re lighter.
I’m a lot lighter, faster, and agile now, though I definitely can get better, faster, lighter, and more agile. So you saw how I looked like a year ago above.
Now here are some journal shots to document how I look like today. I look like a different person huh?
Losing the weight means I have longer limbs to catch on to stuff without all the padding getting in the way. It also means there’s a lot more space in between for rapid movements without knocking into my own body.That has been the biggest advantage of losing weight for me. Looking better is just a bonus.
A word of caution. I hope you won’t go on some crazy dangerous diet just to lose weight for the sake of losing weight. Do it healthily, and do it for the right reasons, and do it gradually.
For me, losing weight is about freeing my body to do what it was made and designed to do. By keeping it in peak healthy condition I can live my life to the fullest!
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Fitness Components: What It Really Means to Be Fit
When gym buffs talk about fitness, I used to see it as a celebration of strength and speed. Upon closer look, fitness is actually a whole lot more than that.
According to this article, the components of fitness are:-
- Strength
- Power
- Agility
- Balance
- Flexibility
- Local muscle endurance
- Cardiovascular endurance
- Strength endurance
- Coordination
Phew! That’s a pretty long list of stuff to have just to be fit don’t you think?
I know I have some level of cardiovascular endurance, but my flexibility is so poorly I can’t even touch my toes or sit up 90 degrees with my legs outstretched. It’s so bad that every single time I attempt to do yoga at a class, I end up seeing stars, sweat unhealthily during mid-pose, and even puked up my lunch once.
Does that mean I should just remain as stiff as a log though? Of course not.
It just means I have do yoga at my own level and pace. If I can’t do the full poses, I just do what I can. The idea is to improve my own flexibility, not to do what Miss Twisty is doing on the other side of the room.
Also for flexibility, I do stretching exercises at home that I learned both from the gym and my physiotherapist in New York.
But you don’t really need go to New York to learn them! All you need to do is Google stretching exercises… REALLY!
My point is, we’re all going to be good at some components and bad at others, unless you’re just super unfit. Then you’ll need to just start from wherever you are at…. slowly. 🙂
And while I LOVE MY GYM and go several times a week, I don’t really have to go there to achieve fitness in some of the components like balance and flexibility. I simply need to know what to do safely, and do them at home or when I am out staring at the beautiful Bornean sunset.
By paying attention to the components of fitness, I know now to improve in all areas to achieve true fitness.